[ feeling : annoyed ]
[ hearing : apocalyptica – requiem of the gods ]
Do you know what’s one of the most annoying things you have to deal with going to the chosen “Nerd” school of the city? Kids crying about seeing a B or C on their report card … FOR HONOURS CLASSES, PEOPLE! They see it as an F. It’s the most absurd thing I’ve ever seen. I mean, I guess it’s ok to care about your grades but it’s not the fuckin’ end of the world. I mean, being at Northside, I have to hear people complain about how they did not get at least a 4.5 GPA or how a 30 on the ACT is horrible. JESUS CHRIST.
Another thing I get annoyed about is the fact the people at Northside take everything for granted. I mean, I know I forget how lucky I am but c’mon! They complain about the coffee shop? What other school has a coffee shop?!?!?!?!?!? They complain about school productions and student assemblies? A lot of schools don’t have the opportunity to have colloquium or fantabulous plays!!!! We are fuckin’ spoiled.
I guess my opinions are null and void considering I don’t think I even belong at Northside. I’m not like every other student in the school who received straight A’s throughout grade school. In fact, I’ve never in my entire life had straight A’s. I was average. Sure I got my share of A’s, B’s too … but I also got C’s ok? I’m generally happy with myself when I pass, ok? My highest score on the ACT was a 25. It’s not that bad.
Well, I guess I do feel bad about my grades. I mean, I have an F, D, and a C this quarter. Since I’m inable to lie, I told my parents this before they went to go pick-up my card. In return, they give me this guilt trip … They work hours upon hours just for me and as a full-time student, I do nothing but slack off and play video games. A guilt trip is personally more pain than a grounding. If I didn’t feel enough inadequacy, my parents have to tell me.
Eventually, I’ll have to quit looking for total acceptance from my parents or anyone else … But I can’t now. There’s a thing called Maslow’s Hierarchy. In it, before one can attain self-actualization, one must experience love … social acceptance and affection. I can’t feel self-actualized when I feel like a complete burden every moment I spend with anyone.
And JP finally burned you Apocalyptica? I like how that rolls off of my tongue. Burn it for me!! :D
I think I take my life for granted..maybe that’s why I’m often DEpressED…
-Jenn- 18 November, 02:49 PM #